A long time ago, the Old English word "wedd" referred to a contractual agreement to combine two families and often involved compensation. The custom of asking if anyone had objections was necessary to make sure the obligation was being met. Not very romantic.

Nowadays, most couples center romance in their union and will often find words or traditions to represent their love for each other and their commitment to a lifetime of bliss. While each faith celebrates with different traditions, most do include vows of love and commitment; sometimes, these vows are standard and dictated by the clergy; other times, they are words from the heart and filled with personal meaning. It can also depend on where the couple is getting married, as some states have rules about matrimonial pledges.

Couples planning to join in matrimony should discuss the idea of vows with their clergy to learn whether personal words are appropriate. While some traditions are steadfast, the officiant will often allow for a slight deviation from tradition if the couple wants to share their deepest feelings for each other publicly. Other times, the words and actions that are built into the more conservative rites bear no less importance to their marriage and allow the bride and groom to express their great love and commitment to each other.

The first known mention of actual wedding vows was documented in the 16th century in the Medieval Church of England: "Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things" (1 Corinthians 13:4-7). Most religious weddings still use preset vows and customs, although many couples are finding ways to interject their personal pledges to each other into the celebration.

In Judaism, the Ketubah, the Jewish wedding contract (which leans toward patriarchal rule), contains promises from the groom to take care of and provide for his new wife, even if they divorce. The couple then ties the knot with the words "ani l'dodi v'dodi li," which means "I am to my beloved as my beloved is to me," and the rings are placed upon their fingers.

At Hindu weddings, the couples come to the stage wearing garlands signifying their promise to marry. During the ceremony, they recite promises referred to as Saptapadi, or Seven Steps, as they pledge to remain with each other for seven lifetimes and are then declared legally married.

American movies and television shows have portrayed more emotional and personal wedding vows, which are becoming increasingly common. The advent of multifaith as well as same-sex unions has also influenced the style of wedding ceremonies.

The two parts of the soon-to-be-wedded couple should start writing their vows a few weeks before the marriage, and they need to keep their words private. The vows read at the ceremony should be a gift to each other and a true expression of love. If the bride or groom has difficulty getting started, think of a favorite poem, song or prayer, or even watch a romantic TV show or movie for ideas. Don't be afraid to revise the words and rewrite them on a fresh piece of paper for the big day.

Couples who read their vows to each other should speak from the heart and speak to each other, and not just for the benefit of their audience. Vows should be about love and commitment and the promise to travel through the ups and downs of life together. Make promises that mean something. Share your dreams. Acknowledge the union of your families and the way your lives will blend without losing your individuality. Tell your partner what attracted you in the first place.

And don't forget to say, "I love you."